Letting an employee go is never easy. It’s difficult on the employer, since they have to hire, train, and learn to deal with a new employee. This may also occur while they are cleaning up the mess that the previous employee has made, if this firing is one of the truly necessary ones. If the job is not being replaced, it’s difficult to learn how to work around the spot left behind by the newly-absent person. And of course, it’s difficult for the person being let go as well. Best case scenario, they can go on and have another promising career. In the worst case scenario, they may not be able to find another job, and become a casualty of capitalism. Either way, this is not a great situation for anyone.
Given how high the stakes are, it seems improbable that the actual method of firing could make much of a difference to the way that things happen between employer and employee. However, the method of firing can actually have a massive impact on the way that your employee leaves the company, and can reflect on you very well or very poorly in the long-term. Here are some of the worst ways to fire someone that you should avoid at all costs if you can.
A firing should be as private as a hiring: behind closed doors, away from external influences, with no one able to comment on the reasons for its occurrence. You don’t want to give anyone any leeway to say that there was “shame” over this, in our litigation-happy age. You want to be the one very quietly, privately telling them that their services will simply no longer be required. It doesn’t have to be a big production.
The reason many bosses break this taboo is because they want to make an example of an employee that they are not getting along with. While this sounds like it could be a good idea in theory, in practice it’s just the kind of thing that will make your employees afraid to share ideas with you. Don’t mistake fear for loyalty, and don’t think that seeds of rebellion and possibly even mutiny will not be brewing the second there is a public firing. This is so humiliating for many people that they would rather quit than live in a workplace where they could be publically fired.
You don’t need litigation. You don’t need an ex-employee to become disgruntled and sue you for wrongful termination, much less for something that could be termed discriminatory. You want everyone to be very aware that the reason the employee was fired was one of two things: poor performance, or something that you have no control over (like company downsizing). If it isn’t one of those two things, you need to find a way to turn it into one of those two things, because a vague reason for firing someone just doesn’t cut it. You can’t simply say that someone “didn’t fit in,” because that could easily be taken as discriminatory, and there are a hundred lawyers who would take that case in the blink of an eye.
Before Something Important
Not every cop on the books has two weeks to retirement, but you know the trope well enough to be familiar with it. Someone who knows that they’re about to be out of a job almost never does work that is comparable with those that are employed for the long haul. If your company regularly employs people who are going to be working on things for a long time, and you need to give that employee time to find a new job, you could be seriously messing things up for yourself in the near future by firing someone that you still need. Make sure that you’re not crippling yourself by shooting your company in the foot. If the person absolutely cannot stay another day, see if you can circumvent any rules that say they need to be notified well in advance of actually being asked to leave. If not, make sure that you carry out the firing as gently and as clearly as possible so there are no misunderstandings. You do not want your company to be sabotaged right before something big comes up and the only one who can save you is the one person that you just let go.
1. Always Use Unique Passwords
It may seem simple, but it’s a step that people often skip. Having unique passwords for each site is definitely something that can be annoying, but it is worth it simply because it makes it that much harder for you to be hacked. If someone else gains access to one of your passwords, you don’t want that to give them access to all the other accounts that you have because you used the same password for all of them. By having unique passwords for every account, you can keep your information that much more secure. It does take some more effort to do this, but in the end it will really be worth it because of all the extra security that it offers you. Just try not to forget them!
2. Don’t Let Websites Save Your Usernames or PasswordsIt does make things more convenient, but letting websites store your passwords can be dangerous at times. It may be okay to do this on sites that you completely trust, but if you know you’ll remember your password then you should always enter it when you log on instead of letting the site keep you logged in. besides the obvious, there is also the matter that someone could gain access to your computer and then, by default, all of the sites that you were logged into at the time. It’s not a good position to be in.
3. Come up with a Variety of Aliases
For sites that ask you give them your real name as part of your signup information, you may want to consider coming up with a variety of aliases. There’s no need to put in your real name on a site you’ll hardly ever use, and it can put you at risk if you do so. Coming up with aliases is a great way to keep your personal information secure, so have some fun by coming up with all kinds of fake names to use on these types of websites. It could very well wind up saving your skin later on.
4. Use Unique Usernames
If you use the same username on all the sites that you use, it becomes a bit too easy for people to track you and gain access to your information. If you take care to have unique aliases and usernames on all the sites you use, then you become that much harder to track. It might be a pain at first, but it really does wind up making things more secure for you in the long run. Plus, it can be a bit fun to come up with a large variety of usernames!
5. Avoid Posting Personal InformationThis one seems quite obvious, but it does deserve repeating. If you can avoid posting personal information, then you should really take care to do so. Posting your personal details on the Internet is not a good idea, especially since you have no idea who could be out there reading it. Keep your personal details to yourself if at all possible, since it could wind up getting into the hands of someone who wants to use it to their advantage. It’s best to keep it to yourself, so think twice before posting your address, your real name, your phone number, or anything else that someone could use to track you. It’s a simple precaution to take, so there is really no reason not to take this caution and make sure that you don’t post things that are too personal or private.
Ask Him to Stop
First things first – you need to ask him to stop. Most men will stop the second you say something, but you have to be firm about it. Don’t start out with a light approach, or he might just think you’re playing hard to get. Make it obvious that you mean business, and don’t let up if he doesn’t seem to want to cool it. Don’t feel bad about startling him, and don’t worry about making him feel bad. If anything, he’ll just be embarrassed that he upset you and might act out because of that. Be patient with him, but don’t take it if he wants to keep going. Also be sure to do it as soon as he starts making you feel uncomfortable, or else it’s too easy for things to escalate and get worse. He’s not going to know he’s doing something wrong unless you tell him, and waiting around forever won’t do either of you any good.
Explain What He Did WrongOnce he stops, let him know calmly what he did that upset you. You don’t have to be rude about it, but make sure he knows that it wasn’t okay. Even if it’s something small that you think shouldn’t bother you, if it even bothered you a bit then it needs to be addressed. He’ll be sure to listen if you just take the time to tell him what it was. Even more so, it’ll build up the trust between the two of you even more and make the relationship stronger.
Teach Him What to do Instead
Instead of just telling him what he did wrong, also give him tips on how to improve. He’s not going to know what you want unless you tell him, because he’s not in your head. Keep that in mind. A lot of men get fed up with women because they say they can’t understand them, do don’t give him any room for confusion. Tell him what you didn’t like, and tell him what he could have done instead. Even if it’s something as simple as touching you a different way, or gentler, it’ll help him out in the long run. That way he feels like he has room for improvement, and plenty of new things to try out on you. If you spend the whole time simply criticizing him, then he’s going to feel beaten down and like you hated everything he did. That’s probably not true, so don’t make him feel that way.
What to do If He Doesn’t StopIf he doesn’t stop, then you need to get out of that situation right away. No good relationship is based on nonconsensual sex, we can tell you that much. It’s a really bad sign if you ask him to stop and he won’t listen. If you’re firm with him, then there’s no reason at all why he shouldn’t listen to you right away. If you feel safe doing it, giving him a smack or two can stun him enough for you to get up and away from him. If you don’t feel safe with him, then after that encounter you need to get out of the relationship. If he’s already refusing to respect your wishes, then the relationship is just going to get worse and worse as time goes on. Allowing these things to happen from the start is what causes abusive relationships down the road, and that’s the last thing you want. Just be sure to make him aware that you won’t stand for anything you don’t like, and that he can’t force you into anything you aren’t comfortable with. It’s okay to not like everything he does, what’s not okay is to go along with it when you don’t like it.
Bringing It Up
Like we said above, call a family meeting about it. It’ll help a lot to plan out your points beforehand, like any good debate. List reasons why you think a diet would be good, why it wouldn’t ruin anyone’s life (especially if you have teenagers), and what the benefits will be in the long run. Also include a short rundown of ideas you have for how to lose weight. Try to make as many fun reasons as possible, to get the kids interested. Be understanding, too. A lot of peoples’ gut reaction to being told to go on a diet is to get defensive and deny needing a diet at all. Be prepared to hear that, and make sure they know that you’re only doing it because you’re concerned about their help. Take your time with it. If at first you don’t succeed, keep harping on it until you get them to agree.
Group MotivationThe best thing about dieting as a family is that you have an automatic support system right there. A lot of people go it alone on their diets, and end up quitting because of it. It’s hard to be on a diet when no one else is, but dieting as a group will help everyone involved. It’s especially good because household binging will be out of the question. If everyone’s on the same diet, then nobody will be keeping unhealthy food around to make you cave on your plans. It’s also great for a child’s first diet as well. Having a family unit to help motivate them will keep them into it and will help them meet their weight loss goals, giving them hope for any future diets.
Fun Family Exercises
When you’re setting up your plan for the diet, you should consider some of these. Not only are they great for fast weight loss, but they’re also great for bringing the family together. Any form of outdoor sport is always great for the whole family, especially fast-paced and team oriented sports like soccer and basketball. Tennis can be good for building arm strength, but soccer will build all the muscles at once, as well as being a great source of cardio. When it’s too cold for playing outside, or too hot, then you can take your family fun indoors. Even game systems these days can keep you fit and active. Every platform system has a motion sensing technology that connects to games that help the family get up and moving. You can dance, bowl, and bat your way to a healthy family.
Setting GoalsWhen planning any diet, it’s important to set goals. With a whole family, it’s even more important. First off, set your own goals. They don’t have to match with the whole family. Have everyone make a list of personal goals. Write down how much weight you’d like to lose, and what you’d like to do when you lose that weight. How will it help you live a better life? Planning out the benefits of something can make going through the struggle much more enjoyable. Also plot out milestones. Set rewards for hitting milestones, starting with small things and ending with bigger prizes. If the whole family reaches their total goal together, end it with a bang. If you have the funds for it, plan a fun vacation as congratulations. For those on a tighter budget, don’t worry! You can just go out for a nice dinner or to a movie as a reward. The same message will come across, and the family will be just as likely to meet their goals. If you have younger kids, having a sticker chart to track their weekly progress never hurt either. It shows them that they’re doing well, and motivates them to continue improving.
Wait, Wait, Don’t Discount Ramen Just Yet…Okay, fair enough, you might be sick and tired of those curly little noodles. But, there’s more to ramen than just dumping hot water on it and wolfing it down while you do your Physics homework. Think about all those amazing-looking pictures you’ve seen of restaurant-level ramen on Pinterest and Tumblr. There are a million ways to make your ramen more interesting, and most of them are incredibly cheap.
While a lot of recipes to make ramen more substantial advise adding meat, this presents a few problems even to the non-vegetarians in the audience. Fact of the matter is, meat can be expensive, calls for fridge space that you might not have in a tiny dorm room, and requires cooking time that you just might not be able to (or want to – come on, you just want to grab something quick!) spare. Still, it’s true that some chopped chicken or beef strips can really liven up the stuff, if you have it on hand. Cracking an egg into the water while the ramen is cooking stovetop is also a great way to thicken up the broth, and make your meal a bit more filling.
Other recipes advise adding vegetables to the mix, which can present the same preservation and cost issues as meat. However, dried vegetables work quite nicely, and last for some time. Don’t discount spices, either. Garlic powder or salt, curry powder, pepper, and chili flakes are all solid options, and keep well on a kitchen shelf (or on top of your mini-fridge).
Cheap Eats Mean Thinking Outside the Box, LiterallyYou might just be in the habit of hopping on the bus and going to the grocery store every weekend to pick up your weekly load. The fact of the matter is, you’re wasting time and cash on both counts. Big-box grocery stores might be convenient, but their prices just don’t have anything on online bulk prices. Even stores that specialize in bulk purchases (and usually require a membership fee anyway) can’t match online prices for a single student. Any and all nonperishable food items that can be bought in large numbers, like ramen, energy drinks, cereal, and so on, can be had for really big discounts when ordering from sites with grocery selections, like Amazon.
For fresh foods, if you’re near an area with a farmer’s market, you can score cheap buys while also supporting the local economy and fair trade. The food’s just higher-quality to boot, which makes thinking outside the big box stores a real win-win.